Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Desert Crossing

*** (3 stars out of 5)
Archer helps bombastic Zobral of the Cygniai Expanse fix a flat and is soon invited back to his terrorist camp for a bowl of spiced dingus and a yerts-versus-skins game of beach lacrosse.

Zobral is in culture war with the Torothan Caste and he's heard rumours of the fair-minded human starship captain. A mighty warrior who freed the Suliban! A man of decency who'll fight for a noble cause! A man with a beagle and a baseball cap!

Rather than get embroiled or perhaps literally boiled in the conflict, Jon and Trip flee into the desert. Whereupon they start to boil. I mean, things start to get HOT! I mean, sweaty. No, sorry, they're probably still straight. I think.

The local government appears equally bored and enraged that aliens are getting chummy with their criminals, and so begin drafting petitions to change the legislation on the colour of the passports they may have neglected to issue. Also, they start lobbing bombs. What else are governments for?

Hoity (even slightly toity) T'Pol again name-drops the immediate burning need humans should have for some interference directives... without bothering to get out some parchment and a zero-gravity inkwell to start actually drafting the damn things.

"Desert Crossing" is elevated by the mere presence of the inked beard of the fearsome Curgan Clancy Brown. You may remember him from such cartoon voice acting work as virtually every American cartoon I've ever loved.

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