Monday, May 13, 2013

Shattered

**** (4 stars out of 5)
Star Trek welcomes you to the brand-spanking new 21st Century with a romp both wibbley-wobbley and somewhat timey-wimey. Zapped by the warp core, Chakotay's nearly killed by a temporal fracture that ages and de-ages his body at random. But his face STILL looks better than Bruce Jenner's.

Restored to normal by that most under-appreciated holographic doctor of 2372, Chakotay's blood surges with chronitons and craviolis which mean he's the only one who can see how messed-up the ship is: for example- that the holo-doc is from 2372. On the bridge- Bunhead Janeway. In engineering- Seska and her Kazon flunkies rocking out with their caulking out. Kes is probably around SOMEWHERE, but she's unconscious in a drawer or something.

Taking skeptical but aroused pre-series Janeway hostage, then infusing her with the same chroniton serum, Chakotay drags his newbie Captain along on a tour of Voyager's greatest hits. The Borg temporal sensors in Astrometrics allow them to map the ship. While there, they meet officers Lt. Naomi Wildman and Lt. Commander Icheb from 17 years in the future. So there won't be any time for the fun stuff with the kids around. The pair of mood-killers explain that there are "now" 37 time zones. And in the timeline of these no-longer-rugrats, the Captain and First Officer died, oh, about 17 years ago.

Can they avoid fate, or will Sam Beckett have to Quantum Leap in and put things right? Sorry, I'm getting ahead of myself. Or is that behind? Who cares?

"Shattered" is fun stuff. I'm pretty damned easy when it comes to time-travel stories. But is it at all telling that with 37 time zones to play around with there was no visit to last year? Nobody feeling nostalgic for the Vaadwaur? No, didn't think so. But I HAD missed Seska, Dr. Chaotica, and a little bit of that dangerous will-they-won't-they from Chakotay and Janeway which has fizzled forever into won't. Pass me some of that chroniton juice- let's see what was playing back in the 2260's.

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