Data's Day

***** (5 stars out of 5)

Whoa, hold on. Remember Bruce Maddox? Kind of a prick, wanted to pull Data's brain apart and build an army of androids?

Now he's Data's pen pal. I guess that's how it is with Data's super-powered charm. Now if only he could use it with his real friends.

Botanist Keiko Ishikawa cancels her wedding to Miles O'Brien at the last minute. As the 'Father of the Bride' who introduced them, Data figures that if the cancellation makes HER happy, it will make HIM happy.

Not so much. Wailing, weeping, and gnashing of Irish teeth more like.

On an unrelated note, Data is experimenting with friendly jibes and insults, with the unsuspecting help of his friend Geordi. The android follows him to the barbershop. "My hair does not require trimming, you lunkhead."

That's one cool barbershop. I WANT A MAGIC STICK THAT CHANGES THE COLOUR OF MY HAIR!!!

Worf is trying to find a wedding gift in the replicator. Fragile wine goblets and elegant swans do not reflect Worf's personality, in Data's opinion.

Data asks Beverly to teach him to dance. She's a prize-winning tap dancer but doesn't want to be known as the "Dancing Doctor" anymore. Data's just about mastered tap before she realizes he wanted to learn a wedding dance. The waltz is seemingly more popular than wedding mainstay 'The Funky Astro- Chicken'.

Chilly Vulcan Ambassador T'Pel redirects the ship to the Neutral Zone. And pretends to be 'testing' Data's security by asking for classified shield strength information. Even I was dubious, and I don't have a positronic brain. Oh, well.

Data has an adorable kitty cat. It does not help him smell a rat when the Vulcan fakes her death on the transporter, and returns to her Romulan family with oodles of Federation secrets & cookie recipes.

(At least to judge from her Keebler elf hat.)

The O'Brien-Ishikawa wedding goes off without a hitch after all.

Except the 'getting hitched' hitch. Geordi was best man, and Picard mastered the ceremony.

Picard also checks out the new baby born during all the Romulan Rigamarole. My wife wondered whether the Captain had a vested interest in the kid's parentage. "The Mendez child" does have more hair than Jean-Luc, however, so the Captain's reputation is safe- for now.

"Data's Day" is five stars to me. Bringing insights into the ordinary moments of an extraordinary world, it also brings the fun. From the blue Bolian barber to Data's deeply unsettling attempts at a winning smile, it's a win. Failures, misunderstandings, and the triumphs and delights of 'a typical day' entertain me every time I revisit this story.